RC: 4-SWB-F (Read and Comment)


"I didn't mean to stare.  I was just..."  She cleared her throat.

Even in the dim light, he could see that she was flustered and probably embarrassed.  But definitely not aroused.  Why would she be?  He was repulsive.  Angrily, he spat out in a suggestive tone, "My leg might not be in working order, but I assure you that everything else is."

She dropped the scarf and her hand flew to her face.  "Excuse me?"

"You heard me."

At that he expected her to stomp out of the room in a huff.  He should have known his smart and sassy report manager would do no such thing.  Instead, Sierra drew closer to his side of the bed.

"I heard you.  I was trying to give you the benefit of the doubt."

"And you expect me to apologize?" he asked, keeping his tone brazen.

"Well, as a matter of fact I do!"  She fisted her hands but let them rest on her hips and sent him a convex stare.

Even though Phoenix knew he was playing with fire he couldn't keep his eyes from traveling up Sierra's frame and lingering on all the parts that interested him.

"Well?" she demanded.

Their eyes met.  Collided was more like it.  Phoenix didn't see sparks fly but he felt them as they showered his bare skin.  The sensation was one he had never felt and he reveled in it.  Afraid he may never feel this way again.


Complex, intriguing psychological dynamic!  It starts out with some clear and evident emotional friction between the two characters.  Then, the emotions quickly shift; on Phoenix's part, from anger to passion.  Will Sierra reciprocate or will her detest of him persist??  Can she (a woman) immediately go from thinking of him as being 'repulsive' to physically desiring him?  If so, what does this say about the female psyche??  Written by a woman, she probably knows better than I.  Maybe Sierra just 'told herself' she found Phoenix repulsive, suppressing her attraction toward him.  Maybe she [really was] aroused by his crude innuendo.  Maybe her attraction/arousal will be unleashed.  Until you read more, you'll never know.  This relatively brief piece shows that the author is skilled at dealing in the area of, and artfully highlighting, a wide range of ever-changing emotions related to male/female social interractions which are, perhaps, indicative of their distinctive natures, as well.  In summary, Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus principles expressed in fiction, in addition to good writing that makes the reader eager to know what happens next.  That's what I liked about it.  (1-LB-F)

Fantastic!  Even though I have no idea what has led up to this exchange, I am completely drawn in.  It is uncomfortable, yet intense.  The man's outrage illustrates his insecurity and the woman's choice to stay shows she's not going to let an abnormality frighten her away.  The author did a great job of building up the emotions and creating behaviors that provide insight into their psyches.  The transition from awkward to stimulating was flawless.  It's steamy without being sleazy.  Very saucy!  (6-LL-NF)