From the very beginning. Charlize moved [from California] to Hawaii in 2010...and Miranda (her ex-housemate) moved there in the middle of 2011. They quickly hit it off. Charlize was at a point in her life where everything was crashing
down on her and basically 2010 was a VERY difficult year for her. It was so bad that she didn't want to get close to ANYONE...but with Miranda...everything just clicked, possibly because SHE was also going through a difficult period in her life.
So they hit it off and supported each other...kind of like comfort in complete strangers where they don't know each others' past but can just listen with no clouded judgment or thoughts about people they don't know.
When Charlize first moved to the
sunny, paradise island, she lived with her brother, her sister, and her sister's husband...(that in itself is another story!).
To release negative energy, Charlize would run and work out until she was too tired to think. She would throw herself
into her work...and try to make herself too busy to get close to anyone. But then she met Miranda...and she wanted to be Charlize's running/jogging buddy. And then Miranda found out that Charlize was going to do a race...and she had never done
a race before...so they trained together. And Charlize sort of figured that having a friend again wasn't so bad. At that time, Miranda lived by herself and the location they would train was nearer to Charlize's place, so she would come over...have
dinner with the family (See second paragraph). Miranda was a teacher, so Charlize, also a teacher, would help her grade papers...and around that time was when Charlize's family decided that they would move out from each other. So, she moved in
with Miranda.
One day while they were running [btw, like a lot of experienced runners, Charlize hates running with someone; she likes going at her own pace...and she doesn't like talking while she's running. She's in the zone! *laughs*]
Miranda stops her and says she has to tell her something. So, after they run they relax and catch their breath at the beach and Miranda tells Charlize that she's starting to develop feelings for Charlize's brother. That was cool with Charlize...she
doesn't like going in to the minute details...but she recounts the episode as they ended up hooking up and got together. The day they got together, Charlize felt like she lost her friend...AND her brother. She told herself that they were
in that "honeymoon stage" of their relationship...but that feeling never went away. Charlize is happy for them. She truly is...so she doesn't feel bad for those feelings...but she was reminded again why she never wanted to get close to anyone.
She was living with her...but she completely shut her out. The second she got with her brother...that was the end of their friendship. Charlize never told anyone this, her sister suspects it, because she asked her about it...but of course, Charlize
would never bad mouth anyone. Right now, Charlize is talking about her feelings that she's kept hidden. She is happy that her brother and Miranda are happy. At first, she was mad because she never wanted to hang out anymore, she doesn't run
with her, and when they got together, like the house was like it was THEIR house already. THEIR decoration. THEIR combined everything. Charlize's brother told her that out of respect for her, he's not going to move in with Miranda and kick
her out...but when he proposed, that all changed.
Charlize just feels like she's an obligation to them now. Part of her is just saying that she's over-thinking everything...but it's like now, if she had to "re-meet" Miranda...she doubts that they
would be as good friends as they were before. It's like she only wants to hang out [with Charlize] because she's dating her brother. Charlize's sister, for a long time, didn't really like her [Miranda] because to the outside world it looked like
she just used Charlize to get to her brother, and when they got together, she pulled him away from the family. And Charlize's sister wasn't the only one saying that...a lot of their mutual friends said it. Like they had that relationship where
when they got together, they forgot about everyone and made everyone else feel so inferior to them. Charlize's brother would want to hang out with the family...but Miranda would say things..."well, you go, it's YOUR family..." -- of course, her brother
isn't going to leave her by herself!
Charlize is trying really hard to stop thinking about it. She doesn't want it to make her a bitter person...such a miserable life to be miserable. She doesn't want to be that person. But the close
relationship that she had with her brother will never happen, she feels, anymore. Even before Miranda told Charlize that she had feelings for her brother, they had this conversation about relationships...and she believes that when she marries someone...it's
just him and her. All other families melt away and her family will now only be her husband. Charlize is now thinking about that and it makes her sad. She will never make her brother choose between family and his fiancee. That is a decision
that is so difficult and hard...she would never want anyone to have to make a choice like that. But Miranda doesn't see it that way. There was this one day [and tell Charlize if she was wrong in doing this, but] her brother asked her why she's
distanced herself from him; why she didn't call him anymore and talk to him anymore. And he asked her if it was because he had a girlfriend now. And she didn't tell him coz she knew that he would be torn and feel bad. So, she didn't tell
him how she was feeling...she just blamed it on being an adult with a busy life...but she still loves him and he will always be her brother...and having a girlfriend will never change that. It never did in the past...and it never will now. But
with this relationship, it has.
So, Charlize was going through a hard time mentally and emotionally...and she's that kind of person that will always keep a smile on her face no matter what she's feeling. Her brother is probably the only one that
can usually pick it out. Charlize likes to solve her problems on her own in her own time...and her brother has ALWAYS been there just to be there. Anyways, he told Charlize that the Blue Angels were going to be coming to island...and she absolutely
loves airshows! Absolutely LOVES them! And she loves the Blue Angels...so, he told her that he missed just hanging out so he planned that he was going to take Charlize...just her and him. Last minute he called her to tell her that he couldn't
make it. Part of Charlize was just saying to "go by myself"...but that's no fun. She asked Miranda if she wanted to go with her...she said that airshows wasn't her thing. Charlize's sister said that she would go with her, but she just had
a baby...and that was no place for a baby. So Charlize ended up going to the beach because she could see them in the distance...and the beach always calmed her. Later that day, she found out that her brother had taken Miranda. She
never talked to her brother about it. She thinks he knew how hurt and mad she was. She did ask Miranda how it was...all she said was that she can understand why Charlize loved airshows and she asked her why she didn't end up going. Charlize
just told her she didn't want to go herself, but she watched from a distance at the beach. But it was at that time she realized that what she had with her brother was over. What she had with Miranda was over. And just to accept whatever.
They never told her verbally to move out...but body language did. And they would say things like, "when you move out we're going to do this..." or "when do you think you are going to move out?!" or "I can't wait to redecorate the house!" ... things
like that. And then it got awkward. It was going to happen, eventually. So now that she's said it; she'll just try to forget it. It is what it is. Everything happens for a reason. Life goes on.
Charlize's place.
Her 245 sq. ft. place. SUPER tiny...at least to her...but she absolutely loves it! She has and will always tell her sister that she hopes that she [Charlize] marries someone that she [sister] is proud to have as a brother-in-law. Charlize
loves her sister's husband -- her brother-in-law. He really is like a brother to Charlize. She calls him her brother. He is so perfect for her sister. She loves that he makes her happy...and if it was any marriage that she looked up
to, it would be theirs. But they really helped Charlize in her new place! Her sister LOVES to organize and interior design/decorate. Her brother-in-law is VERY good at building things and just a very good handyman. So, when Charlize
got her tiny place, she researched Tiny Living...and put together a place that she wanted to create. Her sister [who just had another baby, whom Charlize loves just as much as she loves her first baby!] had time on her hands...so Charlize gave her her
plans and she went with them...Charlize gave her jurisdiction to make changes if she wanted. So, when Charlize went to work during the day, she would go to her new place and work on it. Charlize's brother-in-law built what needed to be built...during
weekends [between weddings...clients and her brother's wedding] she [Charlize] would move her stuff over. Charlize is so thankful for her sister and brother-in-law. She thinks that if it wasn't for them, she would still be struggling with layout
and how to fit everything.
Charlize loves her new place! No exaggeration! It's a tiny place...much, much smaller than any place she's lived in before...but it's perfect! As she sits here, the wind is blowing the trees outside her room
and she can hear the soft roar of the ocean, she's that close! Charlize's brother-in-law had built her a loft and a tiny kitchen. Charlize estimates she's 95% moved and settled because she wants more shelves put in. But it's not a bother
that it's not up...her loft bed, she calls her "bedroom"...and she doesn't feel crowded at all. Charlize has always been a clean person...but it's even more important to put things away and keep things clean so that things won't look cluttered.
Charlize has her own porch outside that she's going to start planting a mini succulent farm [she's going to see if she can make that one a wall garden]. Charlize also wants to start a mini herb garden. She loves flowers, so maybe some pots of flowers
over the balcony part. She collects shells and coral...so she used to decorate outside as well with these cute garden lanterns. She downsized a lot...that was hard. But it was like a fresh start again.
Charlize was able to bring her
fishtank with her. Well, not HER fishtank...she had a 30 gallon long rectangle tank...but she switched with a friend who was looking for a long tank [octagon] tank because they have an eel that was getting big...but the tank that they gave her is 35
gallons...so it's a little bit bigger, but it's taller rather than longer so it takes less space. That, she was happy about. The two things that she really wanted to take with her was her stand-up punching bag and her piano. There
really isn't any room for those...but her [Charlize's] brother wanted her punching bag and her sister wants to get rid of their Baby Grand piano [which takes up a lot of room]...and switch it with her smaller electric piano...so it all worked out. Other
than that, she [Charlize] was able to bring everything over that she wanted. Tiny Living is something to get used to, but she thinks that she's liking it. :)
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"This is an incredibly dramatic piece. I get a very good sense of the character's emotions and frustration. Miranda seemed to turn very quickly. I wasn't expecting that at all. It is odd to me that the brother was so quick to
disconnect from his family which makes me question Miranda's motivations and his ability to stand up for himself. This can't be a healthy relationship. It is not uncommon for a new couple to temporarily alienate themselves because they are consumed
with one another. However, the fact that Miranda cut off all ties with her friend and the brother lied about the airshow is alarming.
I find honesty is the best policy & being honest doesn't mean you have to be harsh.
Although she passed on the opportunity when her brother asked her about it, it's not too late for her to voice her concerns. It may be uncomfortable but her feelings will eat at her otherwise. Once she's said her peace, the ball is in his court.
The conversation may open his eyes to see how it's affecting those who love him and that the relationship is not normal. Being with someone you love should be an extenuation of your family, not a replacement. That's just my opinion. I hope
there is a happy ending to this!" (6-LL-NF)